I'm feeling rusty and out of it, from my long away time here in blog land. I can't exactly pinpoint what the reason is for me being not so able to blog frequently this year, but my gut feeling is that this years goals are kind of different from last year and take more of my time than last year's goals, and so I've been blogging less. Also, some of my goals are things I'm not sure how to blog about or necessarily fit into this blog's thematic zone. I've been getting healthier. And in service to that goal, sometimes I'm spending more on things like food and exercise stuff than I was last year. I'm also letting myself off the hook for buying pricier food things if they are healthy and easy. Because I'm putting a kind of premium on what ever helps me move in that direction. I am in my 40's now, so living off potato chips is no longer such a viable default plan nor particularly forward-thinking for me.
The other thing I've done more of is shop. Mainly for my weakness, clothing. And this is the thing, since I've lost 21 lbs (between January of this year and now), I have this wicked part of me that feels VERY keen to try on new clothing and to tell myself that I deserve new clothing! Now, don't get too upset. I've not gone bananas, but I've bought myself 4 new dresses (some were gifts I talked others into buying me for my birthday). I also bought myself 3 sports bras. I feel completely comfortable with
In line with my NoNewForTara goals, I've also reached into my personal possession archives and managed to resurrect a bunch of clothing I hadn't fit into for a long time. Seriously gratifying. I also visited my Mom a couple of times, and as you know, she is the queen of re-gifting, and of de-cluttering her possessions unto her offspring. As such, I was able to get new hiking runners, sandals, dress pants, and of course, her signature weakness-cardigans. Most of these items Mom starts passing to me upon arrival in Ottawa to try on. They often still have the tags on them, or she has worn them a maximum of one time, but they fell short on some crucial criterion she rigorously measures all her possessions against. Lucky for me, many of her items do not pass muster, and I get to have that new car smell without the cost.
As far as my goals for 2011 go, besides the not shopping, which is less than the best, but way better than historically, I've been doing pretty well on some, and so so on others. You may recall, I did an Annual Review and rhymed a bunch of goals off in January 2011. I'll be meeting my like minded friend, Christine next weekend to do the mid-year report card on how we are measuring up to our goals. Doing a quick scan of my pretty book dedicated to this I see:
1. re: money, I am not as far ahead as I'd like, but I am still committed to semi-retirement by the end of the year (cross your fingers for me). Semi-retirement basically means giving up my part time job and only having my full time job.
2. trips: I've been to Boston, and am hoping to squeeze in both Newfoundland and Edinburgh. It will be a tight squeeze financially, but Newfoundland is home, and I really want to get to see my wife perform in the Fringe Festival in August.
3. professionally, I'm feeling good, albeit overloaded. I've taken CBT courses, and taken on new job for the year, which was a very refreshing challenge and learned many new things.
4. creative: I've done less knitting and writing, but MORE ukulele playing :)
5. personal: I've definitely gotten healthier. I've been doing out-of-character things like getting up at 7am to go work out, paying attention to what I eat, and I can actually almost hold my own in a tickle fight these days.
6. friend outreach: I've been seeing and being with a lot of old, and a few new friends this year, and for that I am so happy. But, I also realize how impossible it is to keep up with everything. I've had to say a couple of 'No's' to requests and am still working on not feeling guilty etc.
These don't sound like a lot, but I can also say this about the year, I feel really good and I feel really happy. Being more physical and active, more organized and planning does make me feel better. Someone has said (and sorry I can't remember who) that it takes just as much energy to be disorganized mess, as it does to be more on top of things. So, all this packing lunch, getting to bed on time more or less, and one legged squats are seemingly worth the bother. Like my stepmother told me, though, I also don't want to make drastic quick changes to my health that I can't sustain, so I'm trying to be pretty gradual about it all to trick my body into not noticing and doing a big rebound or something. I'm not willing to entertain any food plan that doesn't leave room for tall boys and chips.
Soooo, just thought I'd parachute in and give you an update. I still buy many things second hand, or talk people into buying them for me/giving them to me from their own closets, but my scorecard is not the 'perfect 10' it was last year. But, that just means I am reassuringly human.
Nice chatting with you again, it's been an age.
p.s.: just reconnected with my old friend from grade 1 and 2, Kyran Pittman, who blogs here
p.p.s.: my wife just got uninvited to perform at an anti-homophobia event at a Catholic high school because they found out she was gay-married. Seriously.
Pleasure and pain
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